Just For Christmas (Just Us Series Book 5) Page 5
Andi looks at me. “I’ll go after her, I think you guys need a minute to talk.”
The moment they’re out of earshot, Emilie turns to me and Joel, panicked. “I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you before, I was just trying to protect Danny, and-“
Joel holds up a hand, stopping her. “Don’t worry about it,” he says reassuringly, “You don’t owe us any apology, and you don’t have to explain right now.”
She shakes her head. “But I lied to you guys.”
“No,” I say firmly, “You didn’t. I get it. We’re total strangers who brought you into a crazy fucking mess, how the fuck could we blame you for wanting to keep your kid away from this weirdness?”
She manages a weak chuckle.
“It’ll be fine,” I reassure her, “She’ll stop fawning over you for a minute and then she’ll get over it.”
“It’s not her I’m worried about,” she blurts, then presses her lips together, cheeks reddening.
I don’t know what comes over me, but it’s like my body moves without any input from my brain. I reach out and pull Emilie closer, cupping her chin in my hand and forcing her to meet my gaze. “Hey. We’re gonna be ok. My mother apparently has a secret superpower we didn’t know about and pries your secrets out of you. It’s how we got into this mess, right?”
Emilie smiles weakly. “I guess that’s true,” she admits.
“We’ve made it this far, and it’s just tonight and Christmas Eve and then we can put this behind us,” Joel says, slipping a hand into Emilie’s and giving it a comforting squeeze.
His words seem to have the opposite of the desired effect, though. The tiny smile that we’d coaxed out of her fades. “Put it behind us,” she echoes, “Right.”
She slowly pulls away from us and takes a deep breath. “Should we go back out there?”
I’d rather pull her into me again and bring back her smile. Or better yet, do other things with those lips of hers…
The thoughts startle me and I immediately feel awful. I’ve done some things I’m not proud of, but one thing I’m not is a fucking cheater.
But what about that conversation Joel and I had? What if that “right person” was the one who’d sparked the discussion in the first place?
“Drew?” Emilie waves her hand in front of my face, “Anyone in there? You ok?”
“Yeah, sorry,” I snap out of it.
Shit. With everything going on, I need to be thinking with my head, not my dick.
“Let’s, uh, let’s go back out there and face the music, shall we?” I sigh.
As we’re walking down the hall, I can hear the voices of my mother and sister arguing. It gets louder as we approach, and I hear Andi yell “What does it matter if I knew or not? It’s not my business to tell!”
I gesture for the others to stay behind me, and the three of us hover outside the doorway out of sight.
“How could you just let your brother bring someone like that home?”
“Excuse me? First of all, I’m not Drew’s keeper, I don’t let him do anything. Second of all, you’re the one who demanded he bring his girlfriend when he tried to say no nicely. And third, what the fuck do you mean “someone like that?” Until tonight, you fucking loved that girl!”
“Watch your mouth, Andrea Renee!” My mother shouts, “You and your brother have a duty to uphold this family’s reputation.”
Andi scoffs. “Reputation?! Your reputation is a fucking joke, mother, you’re a housewife. Stop glorifying it as anything more than that.”
“I’m not going to stand here and be insulted in my own home,” my mother says, “I have given you and your brother the world, and how do you repay me? You run away to California for five years, and your brother shuns the family business and brings home some little slut!”
“Excuse me?” I step into the room.
My mother’s face reddens as Emilie and Joel step into the room behind me. “Would you care to repeat that?” I ask, folding my arms over my chest.
Mom and Andi are in each other’s faces, and meanwhile Dad is nowhere to be seen. Probably preoccupied with something for work.
My mother straightens. “You know what I mean, Andrew. How is that going to look, you raising another man’s child?”
Andi laughs. “Good GOD, Mother, he hasn’t even been dating her for six months, now he’s “raising a child” with her? Way to jump the gun.”
“And even if he is, I think that’s pretty damn respectable,” Joel adds coolly.
My mother shoots a glare at Andi, “Getting involved with a mother means being involved with their child’s life, Andrea, don’t act as if I’m being ridiculous.”
“Mother,” I snap, drawing her attention back to me, “I don’t give a rat’s ass how this affects the precious family reputation, and I’m not going to put up with you saying those things about Emilie.”
“Saying what, Andrew? The same things everyone else will be saying?” My mother counters, her tone challenging, “I knew I should have chosen someone appropriate for you years ago, you’d be settled and out of trouble by now instead of picking up some deadbeat’s slack with this girl and her bastard.”
“Hey!” Emilie steps forward, eyes blazing, “I don’t care how you talk about me, but I’ll be damned if I let you talk about my son like that. And my husband was no deadbeat, he was a good man, and if it weren’t for the scumbag defense attorneys like your husband, the drunk driver who killed him would still be behind bars. Your daughter is right, your precious “reputation” is a joke, because at the end of the day, I know I’m a decent person and I work hard for my son. But you? You’re nothing but a cold, judgmental bitch who cares more about what other people think than actually caring about your own family.”
With that, she turns on her heel and storms out, and I can’t help but feel a little surge of satisfaction and pride. My mother is still standing with her mouth open, shell-shocked. Without another word, I follow after Emilie, Joel at my back.
Andi’s not far behind us, and when we close the front door behind us, she lets out a hysterical little laugh of disbelief. “Holy shit, that was amazing,” she says as we walk out to my car, looking for Emilie, “I can’t believe she just put Mom in her place like that.”
“It was pretty great,” Joel agrees.
“Serves Mom right,” I say, “Making assumptions like that.”
Andi shakes her head, “Even if Emilie did just go out and get knocked up by a deadbeat, it’s not her fucking place to judge.”
Emilie is leaning against my car, her arms folded over her chest and tears streaming down her cheeks. When she sees me approaching, she wipes at her face. “I’m so sorry, Drew, I went way too far, I never should have-“
I stop her. “No. Stop. Whatever you’re about to say, don’t. You were exactly right in there, and it’s about time someone said something to her.”
“You’re my hero,” Andi adds, “If you actually were my brother’s girlfriend, I would possibly insist that he propose on the spot. Hell, I’m half tempted to.”
Emilie laughs. “Gabrielle would have a coronary,” Joel snorts.
“I thought the whole point of hiring me was to hide a gay relationship, not create a new one,” Emilie jokes.
Andi shrugs. “What can I say? I love to rebel.”
Since we missed dinner, I offer to take us all out, but Andi turns me down. “I’ve still got some Christmas shopping to do,” she insists.
So we split off and I drive off with Joel and Emilie. My parents’ house disappears in the distance and Emilie lets out a heavy sigh. “I’m so sorry, Drew, I was supposed to be helping you, and now I’ve gone and fucked everything up.”
“You didn’t fuck anything up,” I shake my head, “You just did something I’ve never had the balls to do and stood up to her.”
She looks at me. “It’s harder to stand up to the people we love.”
I sigh. “I guess so.”
Joel reaches up and puts a hand on my shoulder an
d gives it a comforting squeeze.
“You know, you guys can just take me home and go have a nice date night or something,” she offers.
“No,” Joel and I both say quickly.
I peer at Joel in the rear view mirror and there’s a brief moment of understanding that passes between us without words.
“Emilie,” I say, feeling a trickle of nerves shoot through me, “Do you want to come back to our place?”
Chapter Eleven
Emilie
We end up getting take-out and going back to their house, settling comfortably in their living room, just like that first night, eating and talking.
Only this time is different. This time, Drew and Joel aren’t strangers anymore, and this time, I feel like I can pour my heart out. I tell them all about Danny, about adapting to life as a single parent. I tell them about that electric Jeep he wants so badly and how I’d taken on the delivery job to make it happen for him.
And when I show them the photo, both of them smile. “He looks just like you, except for the hair,” Drew says.
“Yeah, he’s got Paul’s curls,” I say with a wistful smile.
“That was your husband?” Joel asks, “Paul?”
I nod. “Yeah. We had been dating for a little while, and my birth control failed. Paul stepped up and “did the right thing,” and we got married,” I explain.
“Did you love him?” Drew asks, then freezes, “I’m sorry, was that a shitty thing to ask?”
I shake my head. “No, it’s fine. And I mean, yeah, I did, it just…” I sigh, trying to think of how to explain, “I loved him, but I wasn’t in love with him, I guess, if that makes sense.”
The both nod in understanding, and I quickly add: “And it’s not like it was one-sided, either. I think Paul and I both knew we weren’t exactly soulmates,” I smile, wistfully, “But we were best friends, and we made it work for our son.”
“He sounds like a good guy,” Joel says.
“He really was,” I nod, “And a great dad, too.”
I stare at a spot on the table, a lump forming in my throat. “It’s kind of hard to live up to that, to be both for Danny, you know? And trying to keep bills paid, and-“ my voice cracks a bit and I clear my throat, closing my eyes to try and will away the tears as the words pour out of me, “I just feel like a failure.”
I feel a hand slip into mine and open my eyes to find Joel’s fingers interlaced with mine. He gives my hand a gentle squeeze of comfort, something he’s done for me before, and it looses a torrent of butterflies in my belly.
“You’re not a failure, Emilie. I can see how much you love your kid, and that’s the most important thing you need to be a good parent. Unconditional love,” he says firmly.
He proceeds to tell me about his own parents, about how when he and Joel were young, they wanted to shout their love from the rooftops, so of course, they wanted to come out to their families.
He tells me about his father grabbing him by the throat and slamming his head against the wall, about how Drew had barely managed to pry the larger man off of him before Joel lost consciousness.
“What did your mother say?” I ask hesitantly, horrified.
Joel’s face goes stony. All while telling the story of his father, he seemed detached, but when he speaks again, I can hear the undercurrent of pain. “She said that she was disgusted by me. That she was ashamed of me and no longer claimed me as her son.”
My heart shatters. As a mom, I can’t even fathom a scenario that would drive me to say something so cruel to my child. “Joel…”
“It’s been a long time, and I’ve had a lot of therapy,” he says, waving off my worries.
I squeeze his hand, still interlocked with mine, and I see the corners of his lips turn up in a little smile. “My point is, though, my parents were failures, Emilie. The way I see it, the only failure in parenting is giving up on your kid, and I think we can all see that that’s never going to happen here.”
Drew nods in agreement.
“Thank you,” I whisper, blinking rapidly to shoo away the tears stinging my eyes.
I slip my other hand into one of Drew’s and look from Joel to him. “For what it’s worth,” I say, “If my son turns out to be half the man either one of you is, I’m gonna be really fucking proud.”
What happens next is the last thing I’m expecting. When I look back at Drew, he’s staring at me with an intensity I’ve never seen before, and before I can blink, his mouth is on mine.
I let out a muffled yelp of surprise and pull back. “Wh-“
But before I can bring a question to my lips, Joel grabs my chin, turning my face toward him, and makes better use of them, kissing me hard.
My pulse is racing and I can’t think straight. Joel releases me before I can tear away and I bring my fingers up to my lips, still tingling from them both. They’re both watching me intently, and I see a question in Drew’s eyes underneath the hunger.
He reaches out and tucks a stray bit of hair behind my ear, his hand lingering on my cheek, and the heat of his skin on mine is more than I can take.
I pull him to me and press my lips to his in a kiss that sears down to my core, setting everything in me aflame. My fingers work their way down the buttons of his shirt and I feel a burst of cool air as Joel tugs down the zipper of my dress.
Once it’s down, I reluctantly release Drew and rise to my feet. They both look at me with surprise, clearly thinking I’m pulling away from them, but instead, I slide the sleeves of the dress down my arms and wriggle out of the tight green sheath, letting it fall in a puddle around my feet.
In these nice dresses they’d gotten me, I hardly felt like I could wear my plain day-to-day bras and panties, so I’d been wearing the frilly, lacy underthings that had been stuffed in the back of my drawer since before Danny was born.
And the looks on Drew and Joel’s faces tell me that it was the right call. They drink in the sight of my body clad only in skimpy white lace and I feel a surge of confidence.
Even before I’d had Danny, I’d been self-conscious about my body, and adding baby weight and stretch marks hadn’t helped.
But Drew and Joel aren’t analyzing the size of my waist, or noting down my blemishes and scars. They’re gazing at me with a lust so intense I can feel it seeping into my skin, assessing the parts of me they long to touch and taste.
I reach behind my back and unclasp my bra, sliding the straps down my shoulders and letting that fall to the floor, too. My face flames, and that trickle of self-doubt returns, but it quickly evaporates when Joel stands up and strides over to me.
He looks me up and down, his dark eyes raking over every inch of me. “Fuck, you’re beautiful,” he breathes, reaching out and running a hand up my side, his thumb just brushing the curve of my breast.
My breath hitches and my heart pounds. Drew rises to his feet and moves behind me, looping his thumbs into the waistband of my panties at my hips. He slides them down over my hips and ass and lets them slip down my legs to pool at my feet with the dress.
I’m trembling, completely bare and exposed to them, the tension rising as their hands glide over my skin. Drew reaches around from behind me to cup one of my tits, rolling my nipple between his thumb and forefinger.
I gasp and let out a moan. I can feel the slick wetness of my arousal seeping between my thighs. Joel leans down to my other breast and wraps his lips around the nipple, swirling his tongue around the swollen, aching bud.
“Does that feel good, Emilie?” Drew murmurs, and the sound of my name on his lips makes me shiver.
“Yes,” I whimper.
“Do you want more?”
“Yes.”
“Prove it.”
He smirks as he says the words, clearly issuing a challenge. Joel’s teeth graze my nipple in a way that nearly makes my legs give out on me and I cry out, clutching his shoulders to stay upright.
He pulls away and straightens, gripping my hips to help keep me steady. But to his surp
rise, I decide to accept Drew’s challenge, and without warning, I drop to my knees.
I make quick work of buttons and zippers and draw both of their cocks out through their boxers.
And I’m not sure whether to be excited or a little bit terrified.
My fantasy hadn’t done them justice, both of them are huge. I wrap my hand around the base of Drew’s shaft and he shudders under my touch. I give his dick a few long, lazy strokes before I let my tongue flit out and taste the tip of him.
He gasps and tangles his fingers in my hair. I peer up at him through my eyelashes and wrap my lips around the head of his cock, and he lets out a low groan.
I hear Joel’s breath quicken and glance over to see him stroking his cock. An idea strikes me. I pull Drew’s cock out of my mouth. “Sit on the couch,” I direct him.
He takes a couple of steps backwards until his legs hit the sofa and he sinks backwards, cock still standing stiff at attention. “Joel, kneel up there,” I order, pointing to the arm of the couch next to Drew.
Drew immediately takes his boyfriend’s cock in hand, giving it a few quick pumps that make Joel groan in pure bliss. “Perfect,” I murmur, crawling over and kneeling between Drew’s legs.
I take his cock back into my mouth, and while he leans over and starts to blow Joel, I slowly start to take more of him into my throat, inch by inch.
I fall into a rhythm and my head bobs along the length of him, suppressing my gag reflex so I can take all of him. The sounds of pleasure rolling from his chest are muffled as he mirrors my actions on Joel, deep-throating the other man’s cock.
But Joel’s moans are enough for them both, and the sounds of pleasure I’m drawing from them both are making my neglected pussy ache with need. I reach down between my thighs to play with myself while I’m sucking Drew off.
Suddenly, I feel a sharp tug on my hair as Drew pulls me off, chest heaving. He’s pulled Joel’s cock from his mouth and he’s panting hard. “Joel, do we have condoms?” he rasps.
Joel pulls a strip from his pocket and both of us raise our eyebrows at him. He shrugs and smiles sheepishly. “Call me an optimist.”